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Men and the City Part 16: The Rise of “Benevolent Sexism”



Men in the city are abandoning the Sexual Marketplace (SMP) like a herd of spooked steers in a stampede (stampede comes from estampida and means “uproar” in Spanish). The clash of masculine and feminine energies is beginning to unravel the SMP like removing blocks from a Jenga stack. There is a growing recognition among young men (and some women – see here) that sex and society are dangerously off kilter and tipping into open gender war. Weaponizing women against masculinity (and traditional femininity) has deep roots and specific goals that are playing out with devastating consequences as we speak. However, a reversion to traditional gender roles – like sound money policies – are making a comeback in the Age of Scarcity.


For any species to perpetuate itself requires structured reproduction.

Sex in virtually all ecosystems on this planet is the waypoint to reproduction. While it is well documented that sex for fun is not unique to humans (see here) and has always played a part in human social dynamics, for any species to perpetuate itself requires structured reproduction. Structure in a human sense implies customs, institutions, and values that encourage, regulate, and facilitate male-female interaction in ways that lead to marriage and progeny. In traditional societies around the world courtship remains a family affair and suitable partners are often chosen based on familial relationships. Elsewhere, communities, places of worship (churches, mosques, temples etc.) and even schools and universities continue to serve as guard rails to pair bonding. However, for men (and women) in the city no such structure exists anymore beyond a Tinder algorithm.



As feminism (now wokism) has advanced under the auspices of “female empowerment” the revolt on reproduction (and marriage) is front and center. Whether it is Sheryl Sandberg’s date bad boys now, settle for Dad’s later ethos or corporate shows like Partner Track, the demonization of reproduction is boilerplate wokism. If sex and reproduction are fundamentally severed, sex for pleasure becomes the hollow point of male-female carnal interaction. Female mate selection – the governing principle of all SMPs – now skews toward sex for pleasure. Ironically, sex for pleasure is provoking a role reversal as men – historically the looser sex – are pushing back against promiscuity.


New Standards, Old Values


Both genders are seeking more traditional masculine-feminine archetypes, what some call “Benevolent Sexism.” New surveys suggest the epidemic of boss bitches, fuckboys and spinning plates is prompting new dealbreakers among dating participants. Women are swiping left on men flashing pics with hot chicks (flexing sexual street cred), poor grammar, and shirtless bodies. Men are swiping left on women with nose piercings, shallow lists of must haves (minimum height, income etc.), and Only Fans accounts. Both men and women have soured on “gender pronouns.” Old values are reasserting themselves as new standards.


Both genders are seeking more traditional masculine-feminine archetypes, what some call “Benevolent Sexism.”

The toxicity of the Sexual Marketplace is the reorganizing principle for men in the city. A 21st century masculine ethos that stresses sexual austerity, self-improvement over chasing girls, and careful mate selection is taking shape in the Manosphere. The masses of de-selected sexless men have little incentive to participate in the SMP, high-value men are increasingly scared off by divorce and financial devastation, and men-in-between confront women who delay or disparage marriage, and often view them as undesirable leftovers. In any case, men in the city are prioritizing more agreeable, traditional, and feminine women. Unfortunately, the dearth of women who fit the bill has triggered a Birthgap.



Qui bono if all parties are disincentivized to reproduce? Answer – no one. Fertility rates are cliff diving (see documentary above), especially in developed countries where the most educated populations and wealthiest countries are falling well below replacement levels. Certainly, more traditional societies spared the intergender venom of wokism fare better, and most retain the structured reproduction that has been eviscerated in the West. Nevertheless, as developing societies urbanize and tap into a global SMP one wonders how much longer they can resist? Fertility disruption has already created a vicious feedback loop of downstream social-economic and political consequences with seismic effects.


The Feminine Mystique


Despite the clichéd storyline of female powerlessness and male oppression preached as gospel by Second-Wave Feminism and its antecedent’s (Bolsheviks, Jacobins etc.) women have always exerted tremendous power in human societies. In fact, historically, women in many ways have been the most powerful sex, as they are in many mammalian species (read more here). The Myth of Male Power by Warren Ferrell describes female disempowerment as more myth than reality, and for obvious reasons. Women are the selectors, nature’s desired sex, and men compete (and most lose) for the privilege of being selected. Conversely, The Feminine Mystique, a book by Betty Friedan – was a precision-guided assault on the taproot of all societies – reproduction.


Historically, women in many ways have been the most powerful sex.

Friedan and her feminist cohort (Simone de Beauvoir for example) sought to convince women that fertility was a burden rather than the essence of feminine power. Women – according to Friedan – were confined, unhappy, and stuck in an oppressive structure that constrained their ambitions and free thinking so they could be mothers only. Her scathing criticism was directed largely at 1950’s America, a culture so she claimed that restricted women to homemaking and child rearing, roles women occupy in most societies across the world even now. Some of her criticism was grounded in real limitations women faced at the time, but conditioning women to disdain or abandon motherhood ignited a transformation that pitted women against their own nature.


The strengths and weaknesses, temptations and vices, and natural urges we feel are the things that make us human. As we mature and age those endeavoring for self-improvement work to limit our weaknesses and polish our strengthens, and doing so requires aligning our natural instincts and passions with real-world ambitions. Modern women have been discouraged from trusting their nature. Rather, like emasculated men who have been softened by a tamed manhood and shamed into compliance, women have been herded towards career advancement at the expense of reproduction. Women by wide margins report rising unhappiness as a result and society faces dire consequences.


Contrast and Complimentary

Feminine and masculine energies are both in deficit. When men will be women and women will be men society ends up with neither. Welcome to the current state of affairs between genders. Dates or even online exchanges in the global SMP often stoke a competitive tension. Conversations quickly devolve into resume contests, political debates or a minefield of potential conflict supercharged by overt skepticism between masculine and feminine. At the heart of this tension is insecurity.


When men will be women and women will be men society ends up with neither.

Females are more masculine, men are less masculine, and the result is utter confusion. What once was a harmonious contrast of two distinct and complimentary energies sort of like sin-cosine waves dancing side-by-side is now a flat line of dissonance. When both men and women aim to be the same person, to achieve the same ambitions, there is no rhythm, no poetry, and no reproduction. There is also no leadership and less cooperation in society and social disruption soon follows. The rise of sexless men and the Sheconomy evidence the discord.


Iron Sharpens Iron

Where do we go from here? SMP disequilibrium is pushing men in the city closer together and women farther apart. A key difference between men and women is competition. Women seek social harmony and consensus on the surface but ruthlessly compete with other women for high-value-men at the top of sexual pyramids. Men, by contrast, compete to establish hierarchy, to order society along lines of alphas and betas. Competition brings men closer together because “iron sharpens iron” so one man sharpens another while women frequently wage perpetual war against each other.



Women compete in endless games of psychological warfare and rarely capitulate, win or lose. A similar dynamic is dividing modern women against each other: mothers against feminists, boss bitches against basic bitches, and gold-diggers against homemakers all vying for the same men and the same resources. The scarcity of “top shelf” men is triggering internecine female friction and wokism compounds it. While there is fledgling resistance to wokism within female circles it comes at great social cost to women trying to fit in and keen to avoid conflict. What a mess.


With any luck, Neo-Masculinity will revive a “sacred feminine” counterpart so both sexes can lead us out of intergender toxicity.

Men in the city – on the other hand – are coalescing into resistance. The ultimate expression of masculine empowerment is a mass movement of men who come together under alpha-kings, generals, or chiefs. Men respect hierarchy and model successful men as standards to follow, which is why mentorship is so crucial for young men. Neo-Masculinity is emerging as the powerful counterweight to a dysfunctional SMP, and its mission is to rebalance masculine and feminine. With any luck, Neo-Masculinity will revive a “sacred feminine” counterpart so both sexes can lead us out of intergender toxicity and towards a more "benevolent sexism," to harmonize masculine and feminine energies once again.


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